One thing that has surprised me when I’ve talked to friends about setting up this blog is how many begged me to include verbal abuse at work. Having experienced workplace verbal abuse I had planned to discuss the subject, but I didn’t realize how many people I know have also been in that situation. In some ways it can be harder to deal with, as leaving can do career damage and some fields are gossipy and have restricted opportunities.
A friend recently told me about an incident she had at work. The team Shari’s been working on has lost several people recently and her boss, we’ll call him Greg for now, has been expecting the rest of the team to take up the slack on the project. Greg informed Shari this week that he was giving her all the responsibility of one of these open positions, in addition to her own work. When she told him she was willing to try and help out while there is a gap, but that she cannot do the work of two people, and she doesn’t have training for part of the other position’s work he got angry. Greg told Shari that he owned her and she would do as she was told.
Seriously! Big mistake on his part! Shari stayed calm, restated her position, and went back to her office. She got over the initial shock, then she went to Greg’s supervisor, Bill, and later let his supervisor, John, know what was going on. She also learned another coworker had overheard the conversation and would back her up.
Both Bill and John handled the situation well. They assured Shari she would only be held responsible for doing her actual job. They also thanked her for coming to them. In this case both Bill and John were aware there was a problem with Greg because so many people left his projects. They either transferred within the company or left completely. But neither Bill nor John had been able to take action about Greg’s behavior. Why? Because not one of the employees that left Greg’s projects had filed complaints. Bill and John weren’t sure what the problem was, just that people kept leaving Greg’s projects.
Documenting and reporting workplace abuse is always the first step. Document, so you’ll have a record of what happened, when, and who else was present. Report what happened. No, not all supervisors handle verbal abuse well, many of mine were part of the problem. But you have no chance of resolution without reporting. It also creates a trail and establishes patterns if you have to take stronger action later.